Purified by Obedience: The Forgotten Grace of Spiritual Guidance

A faithful friend is a strong defense:

whoever has found one has found a treasure. —Sirach 6:14

The first step of our spiritual health is to be purified. --St. Francis de Sales, Introduction to the Devout Life

[Note: While I will be using the masculine pronouns when speaking of a spiritual guide, the Christian faith has known many women to act as guides, even to priests. These include Catherine of Siena, Teresa of Avila, and Therese of Lisieux, just to name some of the most illustrious examples.]

Moses and Jethro

Moses sat to judge the people and the people stood before Moses from morning to evening.

When Jethro saw this, he quipped: “What are you doing? Why do you sit alone, and the people stand before you from morning to evening?”

Moses answered, “Because the people come to me to enquire of God. When they have a matter, they come to me, and I judge between one and another, and I make them know God’s statutes and laws.”

Jethro answered, “What you are doing makes no sense…” (Exodus 18:13-17)

Introduction

In light of the symbolism of Baptism, purification is an essential dimension of the Christian journey. This purification can take many forms in the various physical and spiritual penances handed on in the two thousand years of Christian life witnessed by the saints and taught by the doctors of the faith. However, one stands out as pre-eminent in the mind of St. Francis de Sales: submission to a spiritual guide. Before listing several saints who held fast to this practice, he mentions an episode from the life of Teresa of Avila in which she was contemplating disobeying her spiritual director to engage in the extreme penances she saw Catherine of Cardona practice. This is what Jesus told her:

My daughter, you are in a way that is good and safe.

Do you see the penance [Catherine of Cardona] is doing?

But I value your obedience [to your spiritual guide] more.

This moment in Teresa’s life raises a question many sincere Christians eventually ask—one that touches the heart of our desire to follow God faithfully.

Why would I need a spiritual guide?

Scripture itself anticipates this question and answers it with remarkable simplicity. When Tobias was ordered to go to Rages, he confided to his blind Father Tobit, “I do not know the way.” Tobit’s answer to his son was simple: “Go, and find someone to be your guide.” (see Tobit 5)

Life’s journey is long, and we do not know the way. Still more, it is filled with unforeseen pitfalls and dangers, twists and turns. Even as we progress, our enemy becomes more cunning. Faced with such a journey, one might ask…

When you put it that way, what hope is there for me?

To this, Jesus might say something like, “Alone you would have much to fear and perhaps even good reason to despair… but you are not alone. And when you need help, I shall offer it to you through My chosen instrument.”

If Jesus does not leave us to walk alone, what does He offer us through a guide?

In a word, certainty. God’s will can be difficult to discover, and even once discovered can be followed with hesitation or hedging. As Teresa of Avila notes, “You will never find God’s will with more certainty than by following this path of humble obedience.”

Our salvation depends on our decisions, our responses to God’s grace.

Our decisions depend on discernment.

Discernment depends on seeing, accepting, and responding to Truth.

This certainty does not remain abstract; it touches every dimension of our lives:

• What is good in you, your guide will strengthen.

• What is bad in you, your guide will correct and cure.

• In good times, your guide will save you from over-confidence and laxity.

• In bad times, your guide will raise you up and give you the courage to carry on.

What if I choose poorly?

Of course, a gift so powerful also demands prudence. A bad guide can be a nightmare. That is why St. Francis advises us to choose one among a thousand, or even among ten thousand. No less than Teresa of Avila herself was tempted to give up her spiritual growth under the heavy hand of Fr. Gaspar Daza, a priest renowned for his holiness. It was thanks to her encounters with the Jesuit Fr. Diego de Cetina that she gained the strength and certainty to continue praying as she battled her sins.

How do I choose wisely?

Like all good gifts from above, you must first ask your Father.

Then you must do what you already know: pray, seek virtue, and make good decisions.

Third, you must test those God places on your path:

1. Is this person discreet? Do they make good decisions?

2. Is he wise, able to see beyond appearances to the truth of things?

3. Is he full of charity? Does he love God, his fellow man, and even his enemies?

Does my spiritual guide need to be a priest or minister?

While this can be helpful, God has raised up both men and women-whether priests, religious, or laity-to serve as spiritual guides. The important thing is that your guide has some core competencies that you can check for yourself.

How do I test these candidates for spiritual guidance?

Discernment does not end with a single prayer or decision.

First, you may observe them to see if they are living the faith themselves.

Second, you may converse with them. Ask them questions. Seek their counsel. Perhaps at first about some very small matters. And if they show proficiency, test them again with a weightier matter.

If what he tells you is not a sin, even if it is not the path you would have followed, consider taking his advice and looking for the fruits: love, joy, peace, strength, certainty, etc.

What do I do when I find someone to guide me?

1. Give thanks to God.

2. Meet regularly with this person as long as circumstances allow.

3. Treat him as God’s chosen instrument for you. Tell him everything with confidence. Obey him in all things with reverence.

Moses and Jethro Continued

Scripture now returns to where we began, offering a final, decisive lesson:

“What you are doing makes no sense. You and this people will wear away for this task is too heavy for you, and you can’t perform it alone.

You need time to pray before God.

You must teach God’s people His laws before issues come up.

You shall appoint able men who fear God, men of truth, hating covetousness, and make them judges… and all small matters they shall judge…

If you do this, then you shall endure, and all this people shall journey in peace.”

(cf. Exodus 18:17-23)

Moses spoke face to face with God. Moses was the humblest man on earth. Moses could judge rightly the most convoluted cases of others. There was only one spot where Moses was blind, a fool, in need of a guide: himself.

It’s not even that he saw the problem, but couldn’t find a solution. He couldn’t even see the problem, because the problem had become normal. As the old saying goes, “To a worm in horseradish, the whole world is horseradish.”

If Moses had continued doing as he’d always done, he could’ve destroyed himself and God’s people. Thanks be to God for Jethro and the purification of truth he proved for Moses. Thanks be to God for spiritual guides—and for the humility to receive them.

If you are someone who benefits from worksheets, here is one for discerning a spiritual guide.

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