Mental Prayer: A Conversation with Fr. Sal

Maggie took a deep breath as she walked toward Father Sal's office for her first spiritual direction appointment. She wasn't even sure what she was supposed to say.

But when she finally sat down, the question came out almost immediately. "Father Sal, everyone keeps telling me prayer changes everything. But honestly, most days it just feels like another thing on my to-do list."

Father Sal smiled gently. "That's because you haven't discovered mental prayer/daily meditation yet."

"What’s so special about it?”

“It’s the great secret of the spiritual life.”

“That sounds like a sales pitch.”

He laughed. “Fair enough. Let me put it this way. Most things in life improve what already exists. Mental prayer transforms it.”

“Transforms?”

“Yes. Think of a caterpillar becoming a butterfly. Prayer doesn’t just polish our lives—it changes them.”

Maggie leaned forward a little. “Okay,” she said. “Now I’m curious.”

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Why Mental Prayer Matters

“St. Francis de Sales believed mental prayer was the most important habit in the Christian life,” Father Sal said.

“More important than anything else?”

“In a sense, yes. Because it’s where our friendship with God grows. If you regularly spend time speaking with God and listening to Him, your mind changes, your heart changes, and eventually your life changes.”

“So prayer isn’t just asking for things?”

“No,” Father Sal said. “It’s friendship.”

He paused and added, “St. Teresa of Avila once said: ‘Whoever begins to practice prayer should not abandon it, whatever trials may come.’ Once someone discovers the power of prayer, it becomes the anchor of their whole life.”

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When Should You Pray?

“Okay,” Maggie said. “So when am I supposed to do this?”

“Whenever your mind is most free.”

“Everyone says early morning.”

“That works for some people,” Father Sal said. “But not everyone.”

He told her about a Catholic CEO who struggled with morning prayer for years. “Eventually he realized his best time was later in the evening. After dinner, once the day slowed down, he’d spend a few minutes playing guitar to unwind—and then he’d pray. That’s when his mind was finally clear.”

“So the rule is…?”

“Pray when you're at your best.”

Maggie thought for a moment. “Honestly, the only quiet moment in my day is after the kids are asleep.”

Father Sal nodded. “That sounds like your moment.”

“Maybe fifteen to thirty minutes before bed.”

“Perfect.”

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Where Should You Pray?

“Next question,” Maggie said. “Where?”

“Somewhere with as few distractions as possible.”

He told her about a nurse who worked twelve-hour hospital shifts. “She’d listen to a spiritual talk while driving to work. Then she’d arrive early, sit in her car, and spend fifteen minutes journaling and talking to God.”

“In her car?”

“Sometimes holiness happens in very ordinary places.”

Maggie laughed. “So my couch after bedtime prayers?”

“Exactly.”

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How Do You Actually Pray?

“Alright,” Maggie said. “What do I actually do for the time in prayer?”

“First,” Father Sal said, “place yourself in God’s presence.”

“How?”

“St. Francis de Sales suggests four simple ways:

• Remember God is everywhere
• Imagine Jesus beside you
• Recall that He lives within your heart
• Place yourself inside a scene from the Gospel

Pick one and pause there for a moment.”

“That already sounds easier than I expected,” Maggie said.

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The Heart of Prayer

“Then read a bit from Scripture or writings from the saints so that you can bring your mind and heart to God. And then simply talk to Jesus,” Father Sal said.

“That’s it?”

“That’s the heart of mental prayer. Speak with Him about anything—your worries, your gratitude, your hopes, your frustrations.”

“And then listen?”

“Yes. Prayer involves your whole person—your mind thinking, your heart responding, your imagination picturing the Gospel.”

“So prayer isn’t just in my head.”

“Exactly. Sometimes even your body helps: kneeling, holding a crucifix, placing a hand on your heart.”

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What If Prayer Feels Difficult?

Maggie hesitated. “Sometimes prayer just feels dry.”

“That’s completely normal,” Father Sal said.

“Really?”

“Absolutely. St. Francis de Sales says the worst thing you can do is get upset about distractions.”

“So what should I do instead?”

“Humbly accept them and gently return to God.”

“And if I keep drifting?”

“Use simple actions to help your attention—hold a crucifix, kiss the Scriptures, or speak to Jesus out loud. Small physical actions can bring your heart back.”

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The Most Important Part of Prayer

“Last question,” Maggie said. “How do I end prayer?”

“By making one small resolution.”

“A resolution?”

“Yes. Prayer isn’t meant to be an escape from life. It’s meant to transform life.”

“So what kind of resolution?”

“One action that’s small, concrete, and doable today.”

“And how do I remember to do it?”

“Well,” Father Sal said, “you could write it down, or put it in your calendar, or connect it to something you already do.”

“Like what?”

“For example: every time I wash my hands, I say, ‘Jesus, thank you for washing away my sins.’”

“That’s clever.”

“The best option,” Father Sal added, “is to act immediately.” “So if my resolution is apologizing to someone…” “Send the text right away.”

Maggie smiled. “That would definitely make prayer real.”

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Maggie’s Plan

She sat quietly for a moment. “Honestly,” she said slowly, “I think the hardest part for me has just been knowing where to start.”

Father Sal nodded. “That’s true for a lot of people.”

“Well,” Maggie said, “here’s my plan. Fifteen to thirty minutes after the kids go to bed. On the couch. I’ll start by imagining Jesus sitting beside me. Then I’ll read a bit from the Gospel of Mark or In Conversation with God, and then talk with Him about it before spending time in silence. And before I finish, I’ll make one small resolution to live differently.”

Father Sal nodded. “That’s mental prayer.”

“Simple,” Maggie said.

“Simple,” Father Sal replied. “But powerful. Because slowly—quietly—God begins to transform you.” He paused and added with a smile, “And one day you may look back and realize something remarkable happened. The caterpillar became a butterfly.”

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